Such a nasty week this is. I have already missed a couple of my deadlines and I am not happy about it. The books I ordered off National Bookstore have not yet arrived. I am so frustrated at how life is treating me, I can actually feel my blood pounding in my temple.
I wonder if there is a secret tonic out there that can constantly make you brilliant at what you do – every single day for as long as you live. My productivity at work has been far from regular and constant. There are days when I am so high on adrenaline that I am able to look at any deadline in the eye and make it cry. There are also those days when writing a simple letter is such a pain. Unfortunately, people who work in order to be able to pay
for the make-up kit she foolishly bought because she wants to be purrty the bills do not have the luxury of waiting for the magic and the inspiration to happen. We need to work when we are supposed to work. Not when we feel like it.
It’s a miracle, actually, how I am still working the same job for almost two years now. Usually, I only last six months before my attention wanders. While I am fervently thankful that I have a job that pays quite nicely, I am also itching to try out new things. I complain when things get too routine. I complain even more when things get challenging. Actually, I complain too much. To please forgive my innate whiny-ness.
What I need today is something to bring my enthusiasm back. However, as the books I ordered are
never going to arrive! National Bookstore, what gives?!! not going to arrive today, I’ll have to wallow in the lullz for a few more days.
Even my extracurricular activities have suffered the case of the doldrums. It has not helped my crusade to buy a laptop within the next few months. I have been dallying with online jobs for almost a year now and I am still not rich. You’d think that working two jobs would churn out more profits. It turns out my expenses for my online desk job badly outbalances the measly pay I receive in turn. A talk with an officemate also left me kind of clueless as to what I truly want to do:
Me: I work online so that I can buy my own laptop one day.
Officemate: Why do you want a laptop?
M: So I can work better.
O: You are going to buy a laptop so that you can actually work more? Kind of weird, isn’t it?
Oh, woe :(
And even if I feel a little dissatisfied with, well, everything, I do nothing about it because I is a lazy hag.
Ending this day on a low note, but I am still hoping for better tomorrows.Yes, I am resorting to cliches. Again, forgive the melodrama. I just needed to vent.
It won’t last long, I swear.